Subjects of Objectivity: traces & stirrings

or, [w]:hole


“Honesty is the best policy.” This simple, age old saying carries a larger weight on its shoulders than we may give it credit: honesty to one’s self as well as others, the ability to ask one’s self questions that we may not want to ask, the courage to look at one’s self and accept the parts we do not like and the bravery to make the changes necessary to be the best we can.


My current work deals with the many facets of human behavior, with a close consideration to: truth, apperception, denial, apathy, and personal evolution.


I started off this body with the word “apathy” as the focus. After a while I began to see that the work was more than that. I realized that I was frustrated with elements of myself. The way I could be, or sound to others. The way I was stubborn and strong with what I thought and felt I had to say. I realized that although I enjoy the exchange of ideas, I come off so strong with my own ideas that I make other people feel like I am shutting them down. I saw this as a sort of apathy, apathy towards change; toward the work it takes to change one’s self. Then this led me to think about all sorts of apathetic situations within the everyday. How are we apathetic? In all the various ways, but then I realized quickly that it’s much more than just a word, more than a psychological term. There is a mood, a color, a feeling that is embedded into the human experience. As time continues on and on day in and day out, our focus gets more and more narrow. Or maybe it has always been this way, and I’m just now realizing it. Maybe I’m just now waking up and seeing a truth I was previously ignorant to. Either way, I am frustrated with me and I am frustrated with you. I think we can all do better and be better and be better as a world for each other.


There is somberness to this world, passivity and laziness even. We are all bound to some sort of system that tries to create stability but in the process enables ignorance. It’s easy to subscribe to it because it’s readily available and takes little effort to absorb. Yes, that statement may be offensive, to be fair, I can direct toward myself, I believe we can if we are just honest. How much tv do I watch compared to how many different political journals I read? Do I make my own food more or do I order out more? Do I go out of my way to help others or do I spend my money on nice clothes? Do I participate in or facilitate change or do I accept the reality I’m given?


Some of these works can be considered documents; collected and organized bits of information put together in way that requires curiosity to access the statement I’m making between the lines. Other works have no statement at all. They are reflective, based purely in mood and emotion.


The work has to function for me in both of these ways. If it is one and not the other, it will be out of balance. If I only presented information, maybe it would appear strong and concise and organized and “well done, bravo”. But then, what I’m talking about is not about that. It is about the imbalance and the desire for balance and equilibrium. so there must be struggle, there must be fight and conjecture. This is what is really happening. To pretty it up would only be a farce and dishonest. So I bring in intuition, lack of information, lack of definition, but just feeling, just mood, just emotion. Two sides opposite of each other that ought work together. A metaphor for everything.